Thursday, October 31

Have had a quick look at stuarts site I noticed googlisms so I thought i would have a go myself and share the results with you good people:

james is incorrect
james is free to make outrageous comments on peter mandelson
james is a stupid jealous fool
james is ready to help your voiceover project
james is finally convinced to cremate himself
james is not tied to one particular developer or overseas estate agent
james is no softie
james is the only word of god today? pastor chuck burke
james is the premier party dj in phoenix for nostalgia because he's been there and done that before

so now you know!

Wednesday, October 30

As usual I am jumping onto the bangwagon and following the trend. More and more people are adding a wish list to their blog, so why should i be any different. Anyway please take a peak. Wish list

Tuesday, October 29

When Gun-Britt Marklund checked her bank account to see whether her monthly child allowance check had arrived from the Swedish government, she knew that what she saw was too good to be true. Her account showed a balance of more than 93 billion kronor (6.2 billion pounds) on Sunday.

"You never see amounts like this," said the 40-year-old teacher and mother of three children, ages 10, 13 and 15. "I thought this money doesn't belong to me. Something must be wrong." Marklund's hunch was correct. On Monday, she informed her bank of the inflated child allowance payment - twice the size of Sweden's defense budget - and the bank acted swiftly.

Why does nothing like this ever happen to me ? Okay so she didnt get to keep an öre/penny of the money including the interest that had acrued but still it would be nice to have been a billionare if only for a day.

I really cant get myself moving today. I have just been sitting around yawning while messing about with photoshop which i am hopeless with. For those of you who are expecting a wedding invite I thought you might like to see where we had in mind as a location. For photos click on bildgalleri and then on the small pictures at the bottom to enlarge.

Sunday, October 27

I have complained about morning radio before, but I dont think you believe me when I have said bad it is but now I have proof That damn little smurf ! (well his understudy!) more to come...

Saturday, October 26

Thanks to Stryktipset, the swedish equalalent of the english pools system I can now watch english football live. Okay so it is only first division football and not the premier league, but seeing as that is where fate has placed Ipswich that suits me just fine. The pools in Sweden is done in pretty much the same way as the national lottery is run back in the UK. Of the 13 matches selected, punters must decide wether a game will finish with a home win, away win or a draw. The slip is then run though a national lottery style terminal and players just sit back and wait for the money to start rolling in. To complete the joy, one of Swedens 3 free national tv stations will show a division one game live with updates from the other 12 games. Todays live game on ”tips saturday” is Ipswich vs Gillingham. So from 4 this afternoon I will be glued to the set cheering for Ipswich doing my best to ignore the cries of ”yay other team” coming from Maria

Friday, October 25

The new air traffic control tower at Stockholm's Arlanda airport is reportedly making the air traffic controllers sick. When there are strong winds, the new tower reportedly swings enough to make the staff ill. Some of the air traffic controllers manage thanks to special bracelets, while others are waiting for a new ballast system to dampen the movements of the tower. The new tower is 83 metres high and according to Pia Johansson, the head of the air traffic control, it was expected to move in strong winds. The problem is that it moves a bit too much.

That doesnt bother me however, I choose to fly from Våterås where there are no risks of wobbling control towers, just passengers who like to try and take guns on the plane.

Thursday, October 24

Maria was treated this morning to a special reenactment this morning to the opening scene of Four weddings and A funeral. Wondering what I was doing in bed at 7am, she gave me a kick and had her efforts rewarded by watching me flying around and turning the air blue. I guess I needed the extra 2 hours sleep but I would have to choose a day when they had plan an intensive day of printing. In reply to Davids query I have yet to hear a cry of Stop the Presses. I hope one day to witness it but I guess the world of book printing doesn't really move that quickly. You are much more likely to hear a cry of ”fika” which means ”coffee AND a cake” which has the same but less dramatic effect on the presses.

Its a big con however as we only ever get coffee, and the chance to raid the tuck shop. Filled with various chocolate, licorice (Swedes seem to love the stuff, they even have licorice ice cream!) and of course crisps, although the swedes call them chips which can be confusing. Paul may be addicted to his marmite chips, but he would be out of luck over here. Again the swedes have striked out on their own and taken a different route to the UK. Your fried potatoes here are going to taste of peppers, dill and spring onions, sour cream and chives and of course licorice.

As a bonus to this post you can also go see how the swedes picture the UK with the online commercial from Swedish crisp manufacturers OLW. click on Tillbaka to be able to see more of their adverts.

Wednesday, October 23

Busy busy busy, at home at least. The contrast with work couldnt be more striking. At work anything to do would be interesting. In the past 3 shifts I have managed to photocopy a piece of paper 20 times, driven away about 20 pallets with the forklift and found 1001 ways to look bored. The printing presses have been going belly up leaving the little people like me with nothing to do. Sounds great at first but after the tenth hour of having done nothing I tend to find myself getting just a little bit bored. We cant even go home as we have to be ready to jump back to it the moment they have the presse rolling again. Oh well they pay the wages if i work my heart out or sit there doing nothing.

Saturday, October 19

What makes someone want to streak at a sporting event is beyond me. However some off them can be more amusing than others. Such as the chap who decided to reveal all (apart from his feet!) at the Calgary Saddledome on Thursday.

"I heard the crowd going crazy and I'm thinking what's going on here?'' Brown said yesterday after Boston's skate at Skyreach Centre. "Then I look over and there's this naked guy hanging off the glass. He goes to jump on the ice but he missed the ledge with his foot and whacks his head on the ice and he's out cold.''

"So he's just lying there,'' laughed Brown. "The trainers finally threw a towel on him. I don't know how he feels today, but that's the hardest I've ever seen anybody whack his head on the ice." By all accounts, lying on a cold sheet of ice is not the best way for a streaker to enhance his image. You think a cold shower works ...

Five years ago, a British visitor pulled a similar stunt at a Flames game but did so successfully. He took a lap around the ice before being arrested and later paid a fine.

Friday, October 18

It seems as usual I picked up the wrong end of the sick with regard to the course I wish to do. It seems I can receive a qualification as a result of passing the test but the actual test would have to be done at the local college, rather than online like the rest of the course. It makes sense, otherwise I could get a team of experts to come and help me take the exam and no one would be any the wiser. I should be getting more details on Monday so hopefully I can get stuck in soon.

We are still having a look around for another apartment. We have informed the company of our interest, now its just a case of waiting to see if we get a chance to rent it or not. We haven’t been in the waiting list for long so we expect there are others interested that will receive the option of the apartment before us. Fingers crossed anyway. New lodgings?

Thursday, October 17

Its doing it again, I keep saying its to early and it should go away but it wont listen. Huge flakes of snow are dropping from the sky and some of them even have the cheek to settle on the ground.

Its time to flirt with the Swedish authorities again. My visa is up for renewal once again so I am back filling in all the forms with the same details that haven’t changed from last year and are never likely to either. Of course everything has to be done by the book but it just seems such a waste of everybody’s time. Maria and myself will then have to travel to the next town to get a new stamp put in my passport. Except the machine will not work as it never does and I will have to leave my passport with them. Which is fine except it will be around the time I will be needing it as we will be visiting England for a week. Don’t you just love red tape?

On a different note the chap running the course I want to do has emailed me finally. Seems he has been sick so I guess we will have to let him off for dragging his feet. I will be getting more information on Friday or Monday. Sadly it seems the course doesn’t provide a qualification at the end of it so one of the reasons for doing it in the first place is striked off before I have even started.

On a plus side I know that my cycle lock is one tough cookie. No amount of general yanking, hacking at with a saw, or swearing at it either in English or Swedish will budge it. Which would be great apart from it refusing to open on any combination even the correct one. Just what I needed after a nightshift. It was no match for a disk cutter however…

Wednesday, October 16

I have decided to try out a new comments system. I feel Yaccs has been a victim of its own success, resulting in too many users attempting to use it at once and getting bogged down. So a warm run james run welcome to haloscan. Both will be available to use for the time being before one of them gets voted off the weakest link and has to go home with nothing.

Tuesday, October 15

Cracking toast Gromit

Monday, October 14

Maria didn’t suspect a thing. I managed to arrange a get together/party for her birthday this weekend and to keep it a surprise. I even managed to keep a straight face when the puppy eyes said “everyone’s forgotten my birthday”. Of course I had to mess something up and if you are going to make a mistake why not putting on the large birthday banner on the corridor wall. It is so typically me to mis-spell/typo a four-letter word. Idåg instead of Idag, its shameful I know, they should export me straight away for that one.

I am sure Maria will thank my mum for the lush section box. If you haven’t seen, or more likely smelt, their products they produce made man soaps etc without the chemical junk that other companies use. I however would like to thank her for making me go to work smelling like a big girls blouse for the next few weeks. Having nowhere else to hide the goodies before yesterday, they took up residence at the back of my t-shirt draw. Lush + confined space = strange looks from colleges as if to suggest have you spent the weekend cross-dressing.

Oh a totally different note, most of the joke/junk emails go straight towards the trashcan, but I thought this one was worth sharing…Dont worry...be happy !

Just a quick message to say that if you have an AOL account and are expecting an email from myself forget it. Telia, swedens national phone company have been block and my mails will just keep bouncing back, ho hum.

Friday, October 11

The British like to think that have a monopoly on mad inventer types but I have proof that they are wrong. A 52 year old Swede has decided that getting stuck behind a caravan on a small country road just isnt annoying enough. After searching and searching for ways to make the experience worse he had a brainwave. Why not cross a caravan with a moped. The caravan sleeps 2 and "Its top speed of 45 kph makes getting around on the roads a relatively painless process." At the moment there is only (suprise suprise) one camprider (You have to love the mental pictures that man conquers up) that has been produced. However interested has been large, and they have orders for 10 more, and high hopes that they will produce 1000 in the following year. If you are interested they will retail for around 5000 pounds, more info on the camprider here. Sweden may avoid wars at all costs, but who needs missiles when you have weapons like the camprider to inflict pain on the world.

Thursday, October 10

What an idiot ! I have today posted a cd that my mum had be asking for. I think she may be somewhat disappointed when she opens the case to find there is nothing there. I am off to bed hanging my head in shame...

Thank you all for your kind comments about my blogs new design. Never before have I received so many backhanded complements in one go ! I am much happier with this one as well in particular the smaller window to the left for my running posts. I think for the foreseeable future I will stick with off the shelf templates rather than dabbling myself. Playing with code when you are not really sure what you are doing is a black hole which sucks in all your time and your left with a template no one likes anyway !

Work has been a bit crazy, and the bosses are not happy peeps at all. Seems that the large print run that went to the press at the start of the week now lies in the recycling container. 40.000 copies may not been a big print run by English standards but for a Swedish book its one of the larger runs that we do. The pages were coming out wonky and it was something that a “stacker” ie me should have noticed. After a few nervous moments trying to recall which arks our shift had printed I realised I was in the clear. Will have to be extra careful at the moment I think as the routes to other jobs are still long and winding. No reply from the college about the course I want to start so I will have to send a follow up mail today. Two of the jobs I applied for have their closing dates for applications today, so fingers crossed on that front.

And as for the state of Ipswich Town at the moment, baa humbug…

Tuesday, October 8

Just a quick reminder that while it may appear as if I havent blog anything there might be a little snippet in the box to the left. I know I have it so I dont bore you with my running in my main blog, but when I have done well I want people to make sure people notice ! The draw for the UEFA Cup is late today, but seeing as Ipswich can no longer draw djurgården (Stockholm team) I dont really care who they play. Now I am off to do some shopping seeing as it is someones birthday on Sunday

Sunday, October 6

We went for a nice walk along the lakeside today and I was surprised to find prime conkers lying all over the place. No need to try and knock them from the tree or hunt around they were just all over the place. These Swedes don’t know what they are missing. Okay so it is probably just bruised elbows for missed shots but that’s not my rose coloured glasses point now is it.

The snow wasn’t as bad as it looked when I first woke up. Looking out the window first thing it did seem as we might get a reasonable layer but it turned out to be nothing but a little flurry that melted straight away. I quite enjoy the snow but it’s too early for it at the moment. I was hoping to get some more running in as yet. I didn’t get on well with the winter last year mainly due to my tendency to fly arse over tit on a regular basis. Actually I think I only fell over 4 times and down the stairs once but to my bones it felt like a lot more. Doesn’t that make me sound like Frank Spencer reborn? Maybe I will buy some winter wheels on my cycle so I don’t have walk so much, but then again maybe that will be asking for trouble.

We have been looking to see if we can find a new apartment. The one we have at the moment is fine but it would be better if we could have one with a separate living and sleeping area. There are a couple that could be okay but we will have to go and have a look at them before we know if they are anything.

The more it snows a tiddely pom...The more my toes a tiddely pom

Its snowing ! Its only the start of October and it is alreadly starting to snow. It wont settle that will take a while as yet but the white stuff is falling out of the sky.

Friday, October 4

The weather has changed here and we are heading towards colder times. A couple of times I have had to brush the frost of my saddle before biking home. I may be getting old before my time, but I think my favourite piece of clothing has to be my thermal underwear. The clear skies my make it cold at night but it does have the added bonus of produce beautiful rich blue skies during the day which really set off the autumn colours in the trees.

Tomorrow I will be doing my impression of a packhorse. We are heading for one of Sweden’s biggest bi/annual markets. I have promised to be on my best behaviour as I follow on behind carrying our newly acquired goods. Apparently they expect to have 100,000 visitors to the market over the three-day period. A huge figure for a few market stalls. I think they must all go to buy a decades supply of socks. Every other stall either sells socks or sweets in bulk. Of course there will be other stalls I expect to see cheap copies of football shirts and whatever they couldn’t sell on TV Shop. There will also be people selling lottery tickets giving you the chance to win something you probably wouldn’t want to buy even if you had the choice. Does it show that I am looking forward to our day out?

No real change on the job front. One of the companies has written back to say they will let me know if they call me for a interview. Maria thinks it is a good sign as it means I didnt land in the bin at the first hurdle but we will have to wait and see.

Wednesday, October 2

I have found another college that is offering the basic finance course that I was interesting. A basic enquiry email has been sent and hopefully I will get a reply in the next few days so I can get cracking with it. I have a feeling that I will already know most of the subject already. What I really want to get out of the course is the chance to learn the correct Swedish words and to have another Swedish qualification on my cv. Anything to get the Swedes to sit up and realise that actually I am only from another country and not another planet.

A couple of new job applications have been fired off as well. I am still not overly hopeful, but it is better that I let them decide they don’t want me rather than decide for them by not sending my letter to them in the first place. The latest one was to the Sweden’s Ski Association, they requested a genuine love of sports, which I have. However it would probably be better not to mention my only knowledge of Ski Jumping is from giggling at Eddie the Eagle Edwards. At least there wouldn’t be any Swedish / English conflicts like there were with the world cup last summer.

My outlook over my job prospects is not so dark as it has been the last week or so. I have to keep thinking of the progress that I have made over the two years rather than the pace of change being slower than it perhaps could be. I have also been re rereading Chris Moons autobiography. It feels hopelessly pathetic to be depressed when he has gone through so much an unbelievable cheerful outlook on life. Surviving being kidnapped by the Kumar Rogue without being bitter is an achievement in itself. To top that by still being upbeat after losing a leg and arm while clearing land mines is beyond words.

I have noting at all to complain about at all…