Have you ever felt like you are being followed? The sound of footsteps behind you echoing in your head. Most of the time it may just be in your head, but not this time. A glance behind revealed three soldiers marching at pace towards us with bayonets swaying. For some reason the first thing that sprang in my mind was Corporal Jones running around shouting they don’t like it up em, they don’t like it up em at all. Okay so it was only the changing of the guards and the cobble stones where more likely to harm me than the young men dressed up like toy soldiers but still.

Apart from the short march from the guards house, were the guards get the chance to attempt to make a human kebab, it looked a pretty tedious job. Standing in the 30-degree sun, just stand there, with annoying tourists buzzing around you like flies around dog mess sounds like hell to me. Hell it may be, but it is also a neat way of linking into the worse job of them all.

If you happen to have landed a job in Prague and your employer hands you your green work overalls, run. Run very quickly and don’t ever return. You know when your teachers, parents and general busy bodies told you that you must tried hard at school otherwise you would end up with a shit job. They may not have had this in mind but it would have been more effective if they had. Prague has a small army whose job it is to suck the dog turds off the street. Of course they have a vacuum to do this with, but still. In 30-degree heat you can imagine what that smelt like at the end of the day.