I read in the local paper today that the local police are going to be mounting an undercover operation. They are going to dive deep into the dirty world of crime. The plan is to station undercover officers at 40 of the places where these crimes are rumoured to be taking place. They will have the power to videotape the crime taking place but curiously not the power to make any arrests. I can only assume that these crimes are too dangerous and it is better to try and arrest the criminals when they are less on guard. What crime is it the police are out to stop you ask? It's a shocking one, leaving old newspapers, glass bottles extra at the recycling centres without placing them in the proper containers. I would like to think that crime is so low that the police can have the time to do this kind of thing. But I don’t believe that for a moment, surely they most have something better to do? If it's cunning plan to stop the littering with just a press release and no real work then great hats off to them. Otherwise wouldn’t it be better to do some proper police work?

With the world cup starting this weekend ! I guess I have to decide which country I will be supporting. I didn’t expect to have this problem, at least not for a few more international competitions to come at least. I mean what were the chances or both England and Sweden both being drawn in the same group? Maybe both teams will get into the next round and the problem will solve itself. Dream on. Maybe Maria will help solve the problem. With a roll of the eyes and a look at says, we are not going to have to watch football again are we, please let me change channels. At the end of the day it will have to be England. After all in the game of life they win by 22 years to 2. If only the game on Sunday would have the same result it really would be worth watching. But its bound to just end with a 1-1 stalemate.

Local photo of the week

I have just stumbled accross the "you know when you have been living in Sweden too long" list on the Britts Abroad Stockholm page.I am a bit worried most of them already apply to me ! Heres a selecton;

* The first thing you do on entering a bank/post office/pharmacy etc. is look for the queue number machine.
* You accept that you will have to queue to take a queue number.
* A sharp intake of breath has become part of your vocabulary, as has the sound 'ahh'.
* It's acceptable to eat lunch at 11.00.
* Your front door step is beginning to resemble a shoe shop.
* The fact that all of the "v's" and the "w's" are together in the phone directory seems right.
* An outside temperature of 9 degrees Celsius is mild.
* When someone asks for "three cheers", you say "hoorah, hoorah, hoorah, hoorah".
* You wear sandals with socks.
* You are not offended when a man offers you a suck on his sorbits. (Im not too sure about this one !)
* When you no longer try to just present your VISA card on its own but in tandem with your obligatory ID card.
* When you finally accept that the milkman isn't going to roll up - ever- and you have to go out in the snow to the shop to buy your milk.....
* You can't contemplate actually doing anything until you've first had a 'fika' (with coffee AND cake).
* You no longer snigger when your kids ask for a Plopp when you're out shopping.
* You stop caring why Lever Bros. called Fairy Liquid "YES" in Sweden......
* You mutter "oy,oy,oy" continually to yourself even though you are the only one in the room.

It seem the Swedish entrants for the eurovision song contest, if not the Swedish people themselves are upset with the final outcome. One of yesterday’s newspapers was filled with quotes from the group Afro-dite stating revelations such as ”it was shocking the eastern countries all voted for each other”. Surely not! I would not believe that possible in such a prestigious competition. They went on to complain that the winner song was much weaker than their own and that no one could believe they had not won. Surely not a case of sour grapes there girls? Then again pop stars throwing a wobbly is nothing new, the more disturbing aspect is that this paper decided to give the contest 10 whole pages of coverage.

Tomorrow is Mothers day. Maybe I should , just in case I have just sent any of you into a sudden rush of oh my god I forgot panic, rephrase that. Tomorrow is Mothers Day here in Sweden. Seeing as Maria is working tomorrow we will be heading over to her mums this afternoon bearing gifts. At this point I am fully expect to see a comment appear in the box below from my own mother. You see, how can I put this, I *ahem*, forgot about mothers day in England. But before you all denounce me as a bad son please at least let my pled my case.

Its not as if I hadn’t considered it. I had an entry in my diary to remind me. The same date as it was the previous year. Is it my fault they had moved it forward 3 weeks from last year ? Had I been in England I would not have had a problem either. Every other shop on the high street would have been screaming the fact at my so loud I wouldn’t have had a chance not to notice. In Sweden they were not, why would they be ? I guess I could blame my sister for not giving me a hint, but that would be a bit harsh on her.

I guess what I am trying to say is, sorry mum. That and when is fathers day this year ?

Driving a forklift truck looks easy and a bit of fun as well. A bit of a diversions from the mundane, a quick spin around the factory to break up the day. So when I got the chance to have a go I jumped at it. After all, it can’t be that different from driving a car can it ? If it was difficult they would have given me better instructions than a couple of shouted pointers across a noisy factory floor. I can do this I thought and climbed on board. I crashed. Not a major incident or anything but never the less an extra scrape on the less than perfect paintwork. Oh well these things happen.

Not to be put off the next day I tried again. I found myself going around in circles. No I don’t mean that as a figure of speech, I actually mean that I found myself going around in circles. Turning the wheel didn’t seem to help, well not at first anyway. Seems there is a time delay from the steering wheel to the actual wheels. Finally I was going in a straight line again, but I decided it was better to leave it at before I took off another layer of yellow paint.

That was a week ago and things are getting better now. Someone suggested I tried driving backwards. Yeah yeah I thought, great wise crack ,very funny. But actually it works driving backwards its just like driving a car. I am now trying to get a little practise every day. My chances are limited as I only have the time available while the others have their lunch. Any other time and I would just be in the way. But I am getting better. Give me another week and I might show some improvement on my 12 point turn. My placement of pallets in the storage area might take a little bit longer. My style tends to be one of a gentle persuasion, I try my best but in the end I tend to push the adjacent pallets out of the way leaving giving the normal parallel aligned storage area a more arty look.

Lunch is just not long enough. You need not worry about meeting me on the read however, as you luck would have it I ride a cycle.

Earlier in the week Discovery channel had a programme about surveillance cameras. Mainly it went into the rights and wrongs of the issue and just how much people in London are being watched without really knowing it. However the part that interested me was off on a totally different tangent. They showed two clips from cameras in banks which recorded foiled robbery attempts. When the security screens shot up across the counters the would be robbers attempted to fly the premises. However they didn’t get very far as the door appeared to have been automatically locked. No matter how hard they pushed and body charged the exit, the door would not open. That was, of course, because the door was a pull door. No I expect these were just cases of dumb criminals, but it had me wondering do banks have inwardly opening doors as a basic extra security feature?

The fourth day of training and overall I have to say I am pleased with how it is going. Okay to say 4 days is a bit of a cheek really seeing as one of those days was a rest day, but recovery is just as important as the running itself. Oh it wasn’t going so well on Monday either when I misjudged the Swedish weather. Being wrapped up a bit to warmly on a surprisingly humid evening and came back looking like a beetroot. But hey, give me a break I am trying to look to the positive.

After prodding from my mum, who after joining the local gym and getting to level 6 on the treadmill, is starting to get a little cocky, I will reveal my training plan. This week started with a 5km run in 25.27 mins on Monday, 3.5km on Tuesday in 17.11 mins. Wednesday was a rest day and I was up early today for 3.81km in a comfortable 19.16 mins. Tomorrow will see a 5.6km run and I will finish the week with an 8km run. A total of 25.6 kilometres or 16 miles for the week. So mum are you still wondering "if your training schedule is as punishing as mine?!!!!"

I thought I would share a link with you to a friends site who designs and handmakes to order initials such as the one below. Mind you if you do decide you might like me please consider her children might not eat for a couple of days as each design requires 48 hours in the oven to finish the process. Intitials can be order and viewed here.

Training Summary

Running total: This week 6.49 km Year to date 51.93km Cycling total: This week 45.6km Year to date 193.6km A bit on the slack side this week, found it hard going to get back into the swing of things after the trip to England. However I now have my training plan worked out and will be starting as from Monday.

I must have lost any sense I had left. That can be the only reason why, when I awoke too early this morning, I decided to get up and go for a run instead of trying to sleep some more. Just a short jog really but still at an hour when most sensible people would be tucked up in bed. Not surprisingly I didn’t encounter another soul apart from a couple of motorists. It was therefore blissfully quiet. The birds could be heard singing, the water lapping at the lake shore, and hare decided to tease me for not being able to run as fast as he could. Even the weather, a comfortable 10 degrees compared favourably. In these calmer conditions I noticed my surroundings better and could enjoy the experience much better. Maybe it wasn’t such a crazy idea after all.

I must have lost any sense I had left. That can be the only reason why, when I awoke too early this morning, I decided to get up and go for a run instead of trying to sleep some more. Just a short jog really but still at an hour when most sensible people would be tucked up in bed. Not surprisingly I didn’t encounter another soul apart from a couple of motorists. It was therefore blissfully quiet. The birds could be heard singing, the water lapping at the lake shore, and hare decided to tease me for not being able to run as fast as he could. Even the weather, a comfortable 10 degrees compared favourably. In these calmer conditions I noticed my surroundings better and could enjoy the experience much better. Maybe it wasn’t such a crazy idea after all.

Local photo of the week

I think I am suffering from RMS, Repetitive Music Syndrome. At first the idea of having music blasting out while we worked seemed appealing. Something to distract from the monotonous work. I should have realised it wasn’t a match made in heaven when they tuned the radio to a station who’s slogan proudly boasts ”hit music only”. Or in other words we were too cheap to buy any more CDs than the top 20. The non music snippets are just as exciting. Members of the public mumbling into an answerphone, sometimes even bursting into song. Or maybe it’s the competition. This stations idea to spread the wealth around the country is to reward those who can scream the loudest down the phone. I would suggest it was changed but my colleagues seem to love it. I cant see it myself, maybe if you were tuning in while driving to work it would be appealing, but for a 9 hour shift each day for a week.. Oh well at least the machines drone out some of the noise, err I mean the music. Rant over.

Remind me again. Which of the two countries that I have lived in is meant to have the cooler climate. Mother nature has become confused somewhere along the line as we returned to a warm summer like Sweden. The trees that were left just coming into leaf have sprung into greenness and it looks like a totally different place. I think it may be time to show my pasty pale legs in a pair of shorts.

What a shame it was to see Norwich fail in the play off final. I guess they will have to start popping all those yellow and green balloons in the city centre now. Sorry I must try harder at hiding my grin, but at least it makes Ipswich getting relegated a bit more bearable. Sticking with the football theme. I was amused to read of japans use of female police officers to combat possible English hooligans during the world cup. While undoubtedly they could prove very effective, the use of martial arts experts and a net gun to trap unruly fans is straight of the cartoon storyboard.

Today we had our regular trip to London. When we are over we usually try to go to the city for a day out. Just a combination of sightseeing and shopping, a leisurely affair. We had hoped to have a boat trip along the Thames as well but that plan had to be put on ice due to arriving just in trip to wave goodbye to the boat. It didn’t wave back either.

On the train back I was able to indulge in a spot of ear wigging. That is one of the things I miss now I am living in Sweden. My grasp of Swedish is getting better all the time but not to the point I can keep up with a fast moving conversation which I am not meant to be in on. It’s such a shame you miss out on so much. Today’s instalments included run away daughters, gossip from the office and little snippets of changes to the railways. Maybe not the most exciting subjects to must people but to my ears they were a goldmine.

So far this week there hasn’t been any time for any running. However if the weather isn’t too bad tomorrow I thought I would try and squeeze a little jog in at least. I know I have been lazy this week but cut me a little slack, im in holiday after all!

After a bumpy flight we have made it to England. On Sunday Uncle Dave came down with his partner for the day. It was a fun day but one that left me questioning my parentage. They say they turn into your father as you grow older but do I really have to turn into someone who organises snall races on the patio ? Mind you having said that it was quite good fun. Will have to pick a "fast" snail if there is a next time as mine seemed to have other things on his mind. On monday our plans had to be changed due to the good old english weather. So instead of being taking of on a magial mystery tour we spent the afternoon at my grandparents. It was lovely to see them both again but unfortaultely I spent most of the time trying to solve the list of little problems grandad had built up about his new computer. I am sure he will get better with time.

Three days with a jog on the trot and it feels that way as well. I should really have had a break today but seeing as we are leaving for England tomorrow I thought I had better try and squeeze an extra run in. It was hard work today and it didn’t help that it started to pour down at exactly the point where I was furthest from home now matter which way I went. Oh well at least I have managed to reach my target of three runs a week.

It will be good to be back over in England for a week, but I don’t think it will be that relaxing. As usual we have our week planed out for us, and there doesn’t seem to be that much room for any R and R. Will be great to see family again and will have to see if the rumours of my sisters sideways mohican are anywhere near the truth. Will be good to see one of my uncles again and his partner for the first time, and to see if my gran still keeps the newspaper while she knits baby clothes. Some things never change I guess. The only things that do are my understanding of them. For 20 years I was stunned that she could always know someone that was having a baby and required baby clothes to be knitted. How was I meant to know she made them for the local charity shop ?

As a footnote I would like to welcome the person that found there way here by searching for the Swedish version of Postman Pat. For some reason or other I seemed to have reached the giddy heights of 5th place on google for the search of Postis Per. You will have to excuse me from now on as I think i will mention the man with a black and white cat on a regular basis, I think I have discovered my niche in the market.